Move to Where Your Dreams Are Most Likely to Come True

Wisdom from Steven Pressfield's latest book, Put Your Ass Where Your Heart Wants to Be, plus advice about attracting mentors and doing whatever it takes to make it

January 24, 2023

“Leave the town or city where you live and move to the hub of the creative or entrepreneurial world where your dreams are most likely to come true. Let me repeat that. Pack up your total establishment – spouse, kids, dog, couch, treadmill – and move to the metropolis that’s the epicenter of your career or creative dream.

Yes, I know we can all work remotely. Zoom will put our faces before potential friends, mentors, and collaborators without us leaving the comfort of our homes. But it ain’t the same as being there. 

Someone may ask, ‘I want to work in country music. Do I have to move to Nashville?’ Or ‘My dream is to act in movies. Do I have to pack up for LA?’ Yes and yes.”

-Steven Pressfield, Put Your Ass Where Your Heart Wants to Be

Teachers, guides, mentors, and supporters are out there. But sometimes, you have to be moving in order to see them. And for them to be able to see you!

This right here constitutes the thrust of Pressfield's main argument in Put Your Ass Where Your Heart Wants to Be, an incredibly wise and stirring little book that I recently wrote about over at the Stairway to Wisdom.

And it's a persuasive argument, coming from the man whose entire life is a testament to the power of commitment and the necessity of proving to the world - to yourself, to others, and to the "Muse" - that you really want it. That you are all in.

Packing up all your shit and placing yourself in the middle of the creative action sends a message to the universe that you are willing to do whatever it takes to be successful.

It tells the doubters and the people who aren't yet convinced of your sincerity that you mean business and that you're serious.

It separates you from the pretenders and the passive dreamers.

Any book lover can tell you that words are powerful, but compared to actions?

Actions make up the difference between the dreamers and the doers, between the winners and the also-rans. Plenty of people say they want to be successful, but when you look at what they're actually doing to get there, you see that they're deluding themselves, that they're not really all that serious at all.

One of the main reasons why this kind of bold, radical action is so important is that potential mentors and guides along your path to mastery are only going to take notice if they can see you moving. They need evidence - strong, action-based evidence - that you're not just wasting their time.

As Pressfield puts it:

“When you move your material ass to the geographic site of your dream, your peers and potential mentors think at once, This person is serious. She has committed. She has burned the boats. She is one of us.

Remember, the potential colleagues and decision-makers who can open doors for you…they’ve already moved to Austin or Nashville or wherever the action in their/your field is hottest. They’ve moved to these places because they’re serious. Because they’re committed.

Yes, technically, you can audition via Zoom or send in your demo from fifteen hundred miles away, but you and your submission will not be considered as serious. You will be perceived as half-in/half-out, as a part-timer and a dilettante.”

If you want to be in movies, you pretty much have to be in Hollywood. Or at least, you need to know people there, and physically go there at least a few times a year.

If you're launching a startup, it's Austin or San Francisco. That's where all the action is, and where your key guides and mentors are most likely to be.

So, do you know where the biggest names and most influential players in your industry hang out? Have you ever been there? If you showed up there, would you be able to fit in? Would you be able to increase your odds of success?

Depending on your chosen career and your goals, you don't necessarily even have to move out of your city.

If you're a realtor, this advice simply means to identify where all the realtors in your city hang out, who the best ones are, who among them is making the most money and building the strongest relationships, and how you can get into the same room with them.

Whatever your goals are, you need to be brutally honest with yourself. And depending on where you want to go in life, and what you want to do, you need to adjust your level of focus and commitment accordingly.

I’ve put together a list of 10 questions that will help you gain more clarity with this:

#1: "In your chosen career or medium, where is all the action happening? The biggest players in your industry - where do they live? Where do they congregate? How close can you get to where the action is?"

#2: "Have you ever sought out a mentor? What leads you to believe that they would accept you as a mentee? What do you need to learn, and to whom can you go for advice and direction?"

#3: "How committed are you to achieving your artistic vision? Are you all-in? Or are you unsure right now about how far you want to take this?"

#4: "How BIG is your thinking? Are you staring at the ground, or looking up at the stars? Are you building castles in the sky? Or are you firmly rooted in reality? Can't you do both at the same time?"

#5: "Do you have a non-negotiable routine when it comes to your creative work? Does the Muse know when and where She will be able to find you?"

#6: "What's the 'level' at which you want to create? Is your goal to be named among the best of the best for all time? Or are you doing this for fun and to see where it might lead?"

#7: "Have you ever pushed - really pushed - past your percieved limitations? Were you surprised by the results?"

#8: "What is your definition of 'long-term'? 5 years? 10 years? 50 years? How far into the future are you willing to perform the daily work necessary to reach your goals? Are you willing to put your ass where your heart wants to be for life?"

#9: "Is your work ego-driven? Or is it the natural outpouring of your Self? Would you describe what you do as 'generous'? How does it bring humanity together, and involve us all in the miracle of creation?"

#10: "You've defined your goal, sought out mentors, identified when and where and for how long you're going to hammer out the work, and you know what it's going to take to make your artistic vision a supreme reality - are you willing to pay the price?"

Your answers to the above questions will help you decide what to do, how serious you are about what you say you want in life, and what your next steps will be.

As always, I’m here to help you figure all this stuff out. 

I love to help people with this kind of thing.

I’ve had my own meandering journey from minimum wage overnight security guard to financially and creatively free entrepreneur, and I can tell you that a huge portion of the success I’ve had so far has come down to the relationships that I’ve formed with people who could help me, and who I could help in turn.

Actually, here’s another great book that will teach you exactly how to do that, called What’s In It For Them? by Joe Polish.

That book is like How to Win Friends and Influence People for the 21st century.

But your career, your goals, your creative potential - all that stuff is yours alone. No one knows what you’re truly capable of…no one. 

It’s all on you. 

It’s all about who you surround yourself with, what and who you let inside your mind, and what you’re willing to do to make your creative vision a reality.

Again, as always, I’m with you.

All the best,

Matt Karamazov